My younger son asked me once why people often come to him for advice with their problems. I told him it’s because “you don’t talk about other people. People know who they can trust with their secrets. And they know who they can’t trust: the person always running their mouth about others. If someone talks to you about someone else, it’s almost guaranteed they talk to others about you.”
“Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; And where there is no talebearer, strife ceases.” Proverbs 26:20 NKJV
The church talks plenteous about ultra-sins such as adultery, homosexuality, stealing… I’m not quite sure it spends enough time on gossip. However, a sin is a sin and gossip is right there with those other transgressions on the “Don’t list.”
“…being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers (gossipers), backbiters, haters of God…” Romans 1: 29-30
Let’s first define Gossip: casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true.
We’ll add the definition of rumor for clarity. Rumor: a currently circulating story or report of uncertain or doubtful truth.
Example: John asks his co-worker, Susan, for a suggestion on what to get his wife for their anniversary. Susan calls Jane and says, “John asked me for marriage advice. I think he and Mary are having marriage trouble!” Jane sends a group text to her friends, “Pray for John and Mary, they’re getting a divorce!”
Now, I know that may seem extreme, but how do you think rumors start? They start with the smallest hint of truth and become exaggerated over time until they no longer resemble reality. Imagine being John and Mary when someone finally confronts them. “Hey, are you guys ok? Heard you’re splitting up.”
When you hear a rumor about another person, what do you do with that information? Does it end with you? Or does it find another listening ear?
“Oh, No. I would never spread a rumor.”
That may very well be true. But let’s say for a moment that John and Mary are actually considering divorce and they come to you for help. Will you keep their struggles to yourself or will you start a “prayer chain” on their behalf? (Yes, even prayer chains can be an avenue of gossip at times.)
So, in other words, can people trust you? Are you the kind of friend that people can go to when they are struggling? If not, you’d better get real with yourself and consider that perhaps you are indeed a gossiper.
“He who goes about as a gossip reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy and faithful keeps a matter hidden.” Proverbs 11:13 AMP
In His Service,
Rebecca Hamilton, Founder/ Executive Director
For Every Great Battle, There is a Great Victory!!